Our Story, Part 9 - The Baby Arrives!

Sometimes when I tell this story it is hard for people to believe how things happened (it was unbelievable to me!) I mean, USUALLY adoptive parents get a call from a social worker or from the adoption agency telling them that they have been chosen or selected by a birth mother to be the parents, and then they get a time frame of when the baby will be born, they have time to buy baby supplies, chose a name and hopefully are prepared with the necessities by the time the baby is born. That is not how it happened for us, but seriously, is anyone really ever prepared to be a parent, no matter what the circumstances are?

Even now when I talk to women who are expecting and are stressing that they only have “two more months before the baby is born” and “they just aren’t ready yet” I secretly roll my eyes and want to say “how about an hour, how about 15 minutes, or how about no time to prepare at all???”

I am not complaining though because I am not a very patient person

~ so 15 minutes notice was great for me!

Our little family - 1998

Cole had just awakened from his nap and he and I were in the kitchen eating lunch when the doorbell rang. Ruth (birth mother), Valorie (biological grandmother), and Bryan (sibling) all showed up at my house as promised about 15 minutes after I got the phone call about placing the new baby with us. How does one prepare for this situation?

I don’t remember exactly what was said, I know we talked for a while and I asked about his feeding and sleeping schedule, what he liked and disliked, etc…

Ruth and I were sitting on the couch talking when Bryan came up to me and asked me to read him a book. I found a book he liked and he climbed on my lap and we read together for about 20 minutes (oh how I missed him!) When it was time to leave they brought in a box of formula, baby clothes and his necessities.

All of us were crying when it came time to say goodbye. Bryan held onto my leg and said he wanted to stay with me which made the situation even harder. It is one of those vivid memories where you can remember sensory details such as smells (lunch and baby formula), colors (dark paneling on the walls and blue carpet that made everything feel so dark and sad), touch (the cold of the April afternoon) and sight (the picture of Ruth walking away with tears in her eyes).

Mykel and Preston

I can’t describe my feelings at that moment in time; here she was giving me her baby boy to love and care for and while I was on the receiving end of this amazing selfless act and my heart filled with joy, Ruth’s heart was being ripped apart.

I think I was pretty numb with everything that had just happened; there really is no way to explain it.

Amazingly, the tiny newborn slept soundly in his car seat, oblivious to what was going on, through this entire exchange.