Another perspective…

My friend Leslie sent me the following e-mail yesterday. She and her sister Rachel were the two people who took Ava to meet with Tony (see post 36 -"The Meeting"). I am so thankful for the wonderful friends in my life! Thank you Leslie! Like I’ve said before, I knew I was supposed to move to my little house on Jefferson Ave. I met some of the amazing people there who will be lifelong friends… Heavenly Father is definitely watching over us!

"I suppose that if you have stumbled across this blog, and don't personally know Mykel and Camille, this must seem like the most unique adoption story you have ever heard of. In truth, it probably is. However, if you have met them, you know this is who they are. Whether it is Sunday dinner or a movie night, they bring you into their lives and offer true friendship. You are better for having known them. So adoption and welcoming all of these precious little people into their lives, without reservation, is also who they are.

I remember my sister telling me about Ruth being pregnant with a fourth child. Instantly, my heart hoped that Ruth would place the baby with Mykel and Camille and that the baby would be a girl. After 3 active boys, Camille deserved a little nail polish and sun dresses, am I right? Ava becoming part of the family seemed like a painfully slow process but I remember the day she came home. Camille called me and we went over to see the baby. Sweet little Ava looked into all of our faces and I could not help but wonder what she was thinking. Camille let me hold her and change her diaper. This struck me as incredibly generous because she had been waiting for her for so long. Longer then before she knew Ava existed. Ava was so quiet and easy going. I giggled for days thinking of what her life would be like filled with the sounds of a house with brothers. Actual. Biological. Brothers. Even now, recalling that evening fills me with an overwhelming sense of how truly special this family is.

I went with my sister to McDonald's to meet Tony and his mother. Nervous is a huge understatement. I felt terrified. I remember seeing Tony meet Ava and feeling a great deal of empathy for him and his mother. Being a parent, I understand what it feels like to love your child. Knowing Mykel and Camille and the family that awaited Ava, if Tony chose it, filled me with hope and happiness for Ava's future. For Tony to trust that they could take care of her and let her go, to be a part of another family would take a great deal of courage and faith. But it is our very nature as human beings to be selfish, to think of our own wants and needs. That day I remember thinking the greatest gift one can give, is giving someone their child. Could he do it?

After reading Tony's post today I realize the error in my thinking. The greatest gift that one can give isn't giving someone a child. The greatest gift one can give, is giving a child a family."